THE KING'S MAN ★☆☆☆☆
most honest reaction: "what the hell"'d a lot of times through this movie
overview: It's actually been a while since i watched a movie i found objectively bad. I was waiting for it to start for more than half of its duration and it managed to make a subject i really like (ww1) into a boring and uninteresting paste. The transitions were cringy, the protagonist pisses me off, the protagonist's kid pisses me off, the jokes land poorly and the music is not to my taste. And thats not even talking about the other half of the movie which was just purely batshit.
Let's be honest, i watched this movie for the Rasputin trailer. And while yeah i did get plenty of Rasputin, it still irks me that they made a trailer with basically ALL of his screentime. The ballroom sequence was something, but something i'd already seen!!!! i feel scammed and cheated. His death was anticlimatic as fuck, and i think we can agree he wouldve been a better antagonist than the actual antagonist.
Like i get what they were trying to do with the villain being an overlooked character, but the execution was so poor and weak that i felt like calling the directors and complaining with them directly. They didnt give any time for the man to be developed which made for an impersonal and sloppy reveal of what was supposed to be the big plot twist. When the Shepard finally shows his face my sincerest emotion was: who's that guy again?
another factor i think contributed to the lame reveal was the pooorly timed humor all throughout. Seriously, it was like the writers couldnt decide between comedy, drama, and action, so they joined all three and all three came out like ass. The only time i felt something throughout the whole thing was in Rasputin's sequence, im very convinced he was the single redeeming factor in this movie.
tldr: this movie was so batshit i was bored and confused at the same time, i cant even be mad cause thats impressive. maybe ill give the comics a chance but i dont make any promises for the other movies.
xoxo dont sue,
yours truly
